TSA's X-Rated Full Body Scanner -- The Movie

Pssst. Hey, you. Come here. Yeah, you!

You wanna buy a script? You know, movie script, TV script, off-Broadway musical script. Tell me what you want, tell me what you need. I have it. And if I don't, I can get it for you.

Just look at this one. It's a movie script. Very, very adult, if you know what I mean. It's called "Airport 2010 -- Full Body Scanners." Takes place all inside an airport security room. Keeps the budget super low.

The storyline goes like this: A major airport gets one of those TSA full body scanners. Passengers walk through it and a technician, in a completely different room, looks over the scan to see if they're carrying anything illegal. Bombs, guns, that sort of thing. Right away you can see a terrorist sub-plot taking place, can't you? I knew you would.

Now, the full body scanners show ghost-like images of people without their clothes on, so you can't really see "the good stuff." Unless, of course, you know what "the technician" knows.

This technician is a hunky guy. Broad chest. Big muscles. He's been trained on how to properly use the scanner, but he also knows which switches to push in order to see everything. And I mean, everything!

He watches for bodacious babes going through security, pushes the right switches to check out their "packages," and then tells another technician to bring them in for more thorough investigations. Which means they have to be "patted down" and "wanded," if you know what I mean. Purely illegal, but oh so hot and steamy!

Throughout the movie, some technicians are guys, some are girls, some are...well, you know -- and in the end, you have a blockbuster straight-to-DVD movie that will make you millions, all because of this little script, right here!

I know, it sounds like pure science fiction, but I guarantee this storyline is 100 percent believable.

So, what do you say? You wanna make a movie?