Another Happy Valentine's Day

I went for a short walk this morning to ponder just how far away Galaxy GN-z11 is from my living room couch. To be honest, I was trying to work out how to celebrate Valentine’s Day knowing that my wife loves getting a giant box of chocolates but can’t eat any of them. I was hoping communing with the universe would help me solve this little dilemma.

At 31.96 billion light years from Earth, GN-z11 is one of the furthest galaxies that humans have ever discovered. It is 25 times smaller than our own Milky Way Galaxy, has only 1 percent of our mass of stars, but is forming new stars almost 20 times faster, making it bright enough for scientists to see.

Me and my Valentine.

It would be nuts for me to invest in an expensive telescope to try and see GN-z11 because it’s just too far away. Maybe a heart-shaped box full of cashews (she loves unsalted cashews) would do the trick.

Back in April of 2017, a team of international astronomers pointed their telescopes toward the center of Galaxy M87 (a mere 57 million light years from Earth) hoping to capture an image of a black hole. After two years of collecting, processing, and analyzing their data, the team released its findings to the world, giving us the first ever photograph of “Powehi.”

Technically, the black hole’s name is M87*, but Larry Kimura, a Hawaiian language professor at the University of Hawaii at Hilo, dubbed it “Powehi,” a word that comes from an 18th century Hawaiian chant. It means “the embellished dark source of unending creation.”

A Valentine’s trip to Hawaii might be nice, but baking a Spam and pineapple pizza might be easier on my pocketbook. Either that or serenade her with “Love Me Tender” on ukulele. Hmmmm…something to consider.

In 2006, NASA launched the New Horizons spacecraft from Cape Canaveral Air Force Station, sending it on a mission to explore the edges of our solar system. It flew into the Kuiper Belt and sent back the most detailed photographs ever taken of our former ninth planet, now a dwarf planet, Pluto.

It’s not hard to imagine how upset Pluto might have been concerning the demotion, but it’s been a good sport about the whole rigmarole. It even put on a good show as New Horizons zoomed past taking photographs of its surface – photographs that included a nitrogen ice-covered basin in the shape of a Valentine’s heart.

I would love to take photographs of Pluto’s heart. What a romantic gift for Valentine’s Day that could be. But the cost of a camera that would allow me to do that would be extremely steep. Tea. She likes herbal tea. Put some in a basket with a heart-shaped bow on top? Maybe.

As far as we know, humans are the only sentient creatures in the known universe to block off a day specifically for giving heart-shaped boxes of candy and romantic cards to people we truly care about. We spend millions of dollars each year on these gifts hoping the gesture will accurately reflect our love for another.

To my loving wife: If I were able to purchase the fanciest box of chocolates that money could buy and write the sincerest love verse that any poet could compose, you would be no closer to knowing just how much you mean to me than humanity is to being able to see beyond the edges of our universe.

So, Susan, thanks for being my Valentine for the 40th time. I hope this story makes up for me not lassoing the moon for you.